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INTERVIEW
WITH THE BOYS OF SEVEN OH FIVE
By
Sophia Nguyen
Chito
Arellano, Roman Cortez, and Tracy Tubera return to SDAFF
this year with their hilarious films, COP BLOCK and
THREE CARD STUDS in our action shorts program called
"Enter the Dragon, Exit the Monkey." The opinions
expressed in this interview do not represent SDAFF,
and we bear no responsibility for any harm they may
cause.
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Q:
Okay, everyone keeps asking so I've got to find out:
what does 705 stand for, and how did 705 films get started?
ROMAN: The meaning of Seven-Oh-Five: A Brief History.
Chito and I met back in 1990 through mutual friends
and graffiti. Somehow, it got around that I wanted to
battle his graffiti crew/ensamble, S.O.L. (Spray Can
Outlaws). Oooooh, scary. It was a big misunderstanding
and we instantly became friends. Eventually, they asked
me to join their said ensemble. A couple of years later
when pagers/beepers became popular, everyone had their
own codes to identify themselves when paging each other.
Our pager code was 705, which is SOL upside-down. Later,
we stretched out the name to Seven-Oh-Five because it
looked more professional, and you can't copyright numbers
- or can you? We left the "Oh" in to represent
the original name. That's why it's not Seven ZERO Five.
It's also the number of times Tracy has stripped at
a party.
CHITO:
705 Films got started when Roman's dream of ruling the
world with an iron fist scheme backfired and he was
exiled to the U.S. Actually, back in 1993 Roman and
I were two broke Muthas - no jobs and no money. I was
still living at my parents' home and Roman would stay
over all the time 'cause he couldn't pay rent where
he was living. Well, one night when I had $5, I called
Roman for a ride to the grocery to buy some frozen burritos
(I didn't have a car at the time). When Roman came over,
he brought a Compact VHS Video camera he had borrowed
from his friend and suggested that we film something.
That "something" turned out to be an eight-minute
short called "Killer Cart." NOTE: No one will
ever see this movie 'cause it was erased by our loving
friend Dr. Neil Nelson Saldua, MD - 619-239-99**. Anyhoo,
we showed our small film to a group of friends during
a Thanksgiving party and they got a big kick out of
it. So, we packed up our things and headed for the big
city to make our fortunes and dreams come true. NOTE:
At that same party Tracy stripped 705 times.
TRACY:
First off, let me just state (for the record) that I
was not yet born when this whole SOL/705 fiasco began.
Thus, I have no clue how it all began. Both Roman and
Chito are 100 years old, and I'm only twelve. I'm a
PRETEEN! In regards to the aforementioned party in which
I stripped 705 times, that is correct. (I made a killin'
that night!!!)
ROMAN: I've just been informed that our lost member,
Paul (a.k.a. Bunso), was the first to use the secret
705 paging code. But I don't care.
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Q:
How did you guys all get together? I bet you guys hang
out all the time and do a lot of crazy stuff together,
huh?
ROMAN:
Chito and I have explained that already. As for Tracy,
we used to hang around his older sister at clubs and
parties. As soon as he passed puberty, we started kickin'
it with him, too. We're all artists, first and foremost,
so we naturally have a lot in common. Our first movie
we did together was "The Chase." I had just
bought a hi-8 camera and I had an idea for a short movie.
I asked Chito to help me out and act, but I still needed
another guy. Since Tracy was unusually loud and obnoxious
whenever we saw him, he seemed to be a perfect choice
for the role - a non-speaking part. We filmed it and
the film turned out great. The mutual love for making
short films was there and we've all been working together
ever since. As for "crazy," would rubbing hot glue on
each other's bodies and then covering ourselves with
feathers count?
CHITO: I bought the feathers....um (cough). Actually,
this Tracy is our third Tracy. We lost the first one
to drugs and the high life and the second, um... you
know, I'm not entirely sure about the second one.
TRACY:
I was discovered by the guys one night while they were
up late, watching TV. I was in one of those "Feed the
Children" commercials, they saw me, thought I was adorable,
and called in to adopt me. I was shipped from my home
island of Melmac, had my name legally changed from Gordon
to Tracy, (in honor of some friend of theirs who passed
away) and was brought straight to their front door.
For only pennies a month they fed me, clothed me, bathed
me, and taught me all I know about Trivial POP culture.
And boy, do we do a lot of crazy stuff together! Just
yesterday the guys and I decided to ditch seventh period
to hit the beach, but stoopid Screech had to go and
trip over the trashcan right in front of Mr. Belding's
office. Needless to say, we got detention until we graduate!
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Q: When you decide to make a film, how do you get started
and organize all your wild ideas ('cause no doubt you
guys have many!!!) Do you hold elaborate brainstorming
sessions with flow charts or what?!
ROMAN:
We basically call each other on the phone whenever we
get random ideas for a movie or scenes for a movie.
We try and hold meetings to take notes, discuss plots,
create characters, etc., but those usually end with
us being easily distracted by "The Simpson's"
on TV. Mostly, the ideas come from our brains.
CHITO:
Organize?
TRACY: As Roman stated, our meetings usually start out
okay, but then something happens to distract us. For
example, one day during a meeting we were discussing
a new idea for a movie when all of a sudden a friend
of ours, Buddy, comes bustin' in the room. "The new
college co-eds are here," he says. So, up we went to
check out the hotties over at the girls' dorm. Meeting
adjourned! I like flow charts.
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Q: People are blown away by the funny, yet amazing,
stunts in your movies. Are you guys in any way trained
in the martial arts or are you all just really gifted?
ROMAN: I'm extremely gifted, if you know what I mean.
Plus, I'm a ninja.
CHITO:
Most of our martial arts are choreographed by the guy
who did all the martial arts in "Gymkata."
And I try to do all my stunts, but if I can't I call
in my stunt double, Chito2.
TRACY:
On a serious note, for the past 10 years I have been
studying Quak-Fu. This is a very difficult martial art
to learn. Only a few people in this dimension know of
its existence. Hey Roman, "extremely gifted?"
I don't get it.
ROMAN:
Don't worry Trace. I'll show you later.
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Q:
Explain a little about how you guys got the ideas for
your films "Three Card Studs" and "Cop Block," which
are screening at SDAFF this year.
ROMAN:
"Three Card Studs" came from an idea Tracy
had about a backyard BBQ that gets out of hand and we
all start fighting Jackie-Chan style. Chito had just
bought some really cool guns, so we added those in there.
I wanted Chito to do his infamous Luke-Skywalker-hand-gets-cut-off
scream. We've been wanting to use Tracy's E.T. somewhere,
so we added it in. E.T.'s also in Cop Block, if you
watch closely. We changed the BBQ to a poker game, and
that was that. I'll let Chito or explain Cop Block.
CHITO:
"Cop Block" was birthed from a Halloween party. The
theme of the party was to dress 70's style (I came as
Scooby-doo). When everyone showed up in their costumes,
we all looked at each other and said, "Duuuuuddddde,
we should totally make a '70s cop movie!" The title
"Cop Block" was suggested by Tracy during a phone conversation.
If it were up to Roman it would have been called, "The
Fantabulous Contraption of Professor Hufnagle."
So, in November of 2000, we started planning our epic,
almost 20-minute movie.
TRACY:
Roman is right that "Three Card Studs" was my idea,
but butchered and molested into the piece of crap you
see before you. I'm really proud of it. And as for "Cop
Block," the guys pitched me the idea. I really
hated it, but they said I could wear the tracksuit,
so I signed on.
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Q:
You guys have some really witty and hilarious scenes
involving bits of random pop culture that everyone relates
to, such as break-dancing in "Space Time Destroyers"
(SDAFF 2001) Star Wars in "Three Card Studs," and Ghostbusters
in "Cop Block," for example. How do you guys come up
with this stuff?!
ROMAN:
We just try and think of stuff that we would laugh at.
We don't necessarily set out to make sure we add some
sort of "pop-culture" bit or make sure everyone will
be able to relate to it. If it's random enough, and
makes us laugh, then it stays in. And what Star Wars
stuff? Great, way to ruin the surprise!
CHITO:
This is what you get when you put together three guys
that grew up watching TV and movies all the time. Something's
bound to pop. Good thing it was our brains.
TRACY:
I have to admit that I am totally influenced by TV.
But, thanks to TV my attention span has extremely decreased.
I can barely focus on... What was I saying? Where the
hell are my pants!?
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Q:
Your films drew the biggest crowds at the SDAFF booth
at the San Diego Comic-Con this year. EVERYONE was crying
from laughing so hard. How does this make you feel -
all warm and fuzzy?
ROMAN:
It's always brings about a great feeling of satisfaction
when we make someone smile or laugh through our movies,
whether it be friend, family, foe or complete stranger.
It's one of the reasons why we do it. That, and to bring
each fan closer to joining our cult where will make
them harvest crops for us while wearing masks made of
pancakes.
CHITO:
I've got a machine that will make fans harvest crops
and wear pancakes for masks! I call it "S.U.Z.A.N."
Don't ask me what acronym stands for 'cause it's a (makes
shifty eyes)... secret. It's always great to hear that
something we do for fun gives enjoyment and not that
crazy Ebola virus.
TRACY: Being able to make complete strangers laugh is
always a great feeling. Now making milk come out of
someone's nose cuz they are laughing so hard, that's
SATISFYING!!!! We've got a cult? Since when? DAMN!!!!
No one tells me anything!!
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Q:
You guys are definitely coming to SDAFF right? What
kind of entrance should we expect from you masters of
comedy? Will you bring your rubber chicken--please?!
ROMAN:
I will be riding horseback naked, butt-naked, shouting
out clever, but disturbing, colloquialisms about our
movies, while eating a peanut butter and banana sandwich.
CHITO: I will be holding a workshop in my hotel room
discussing the finer points of our movies in interpretive
dance. Bring your leg warmers. Coffee and doughnuts
will be served. The rubber chicken was, sad to say,
injured during the filming of "Three Card Studs" and
will not be able to make an appearance.
TRACY:
I plan to arrive at the festival with dignity and class.
But if that gets too boring, I'll just get naked and
ride the same horse as Roman. I'll ride on the back,
and hold real tight onto Roman so that I don't fall
off. TEE-HEE!
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Q: Anything else you wish to tell the public before
we see you guys at SDAFF?
705
CREW: We're currently working on a new movie (a sequel)
so be on the lookout for that. If we finish it before
the SDAFF we just might hold a secret private screening
in our hotel room, but you'll all have to be naked to
see it. Thanks to all the people and their "fan e-mail."
It's been doing wonders for our egos. Keep 'em coming!
Anyone wanting to give us a million dollars to make
a film, please contact us - please. A huge thanks to
Lee Ann Kim and the staff of the SDAFF for your great
support! And lastly, we'd like to give props to our
other members, Carlo Arellano, Warren Fu, Allan Obciana,
Bryant Tsuji, Louie Mauna, Julian Yniguez, Nelson Saldua,
and Bunso.
ROMAN:
I really hope that with this article, Tracy's odds have
increased for getting laid at the festival.
CHITO:
I hope that with this interview, Tracy gets laid at
the festival.
TRACY:
Dude, I better get laid at the festival!
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